I feel like the way you dress impacts a great deal of how you behave. For me anyways. Sometimes I dress like I have my life together to give off the impression (to myself mainly) that I have my life together.
This had a particular impact today when I went to RICE United Prayer. It's a work day so I was wearing full corporate outfit, heels and all. Not only did I feel very old because of my actual age in comparison and what I was wearing, I felt very old because of the experiences I felt I had gone through since high school (even though it's only been just over a year).
Usually when I go to church or a Bible talk or a Christian event, I'm in that kind of headspace. This time, however, I was not since I had come from sitting at a desk all day.
There I stood in a very typical work dress, listening to high schoolers sing "the cross before me, the world behind me." It made me think about how it's so easy to sing but so much harder to live.
Steve talked about the disciples and how they put down their nets when Jesus told them to. I asked myself whether I would drop Co-op, my degree and hence - my reputation if He asked me to. I'm not sure what I would've said in high school and I'm still not sure what I would say now. I'd like to think I'd say yes in a heartbeat. But I don't know if that's true.
He also talked about other people and the world calling us crazy for following Jesus. Definitely true.
I think in high school, things like trusting God and obeying His commands were very much rhetoric to me.
Today I found myself in a similar position to where I was in high school (maybe it was just because I was actually surrounded by high schoolers). Someone talking to me about looking crazy for following Christ and telling me to trust Him like Peter did when he walked on water and to obey His every command, including when it came to my career.
Except this time, I was in a very different place. Spiritually, emotionally, mentally (and physically really).
This time, I had experienced the initial frustration and then complete comfort that comes from trusting God.
This time I had experienced people calling me crazy or weird for following Christ.
This time, I had actually confronted the idea that God may ask me to give up my career that I had worked so hard for (but really, I hadn't at all and it was all Him).
I love that as live changes and He grows me and teaches me, He remains unchanged in every way.
In the same day, as I look forward (quite literally counting down the hours) to going on a road trip with friends, I am reminded again of a period of time in high school.
One friend suggested we spend time in the Word together while on the trip. It brought me straight back to April 2012 when the same group of us (plus or minus a few) decided we wanted to meet up before school to read the Word and pray together.
To be honest, that didn't go amazingly for us but thanks be to God that people still do that at NSGB (yay)
I love that almost 4 years later, we still want to do it.
What a joy to serve a God whose Word and love keeps pulling us in.
And what a joy to do life with people who love to learn and love more of Him and pull me into His Word with them.
I look forward to seeing how God has changed each and everyone of them in the years we've known each other.
(I actually can't remember the last time we sat and read together. Good weekend ahead I think)
:)
